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Hope
In 2009 I separated from my coercive and abusive partner, I had no idea how much help was available to me as I was too scared to even hope that another life was possible for me.
If any of the following resonate with you, please consider reaching out for help:
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you change your behaviour to keep your partner happy/calm/quiet
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you fear your partners reactions
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your partner is jealous or possessive
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you feel like you are walking on egg shells
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you feel guilty seeing friends or family
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you try to keep your children quiet so as not to annoy your partner
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you feel controlled or isolated
If you are in a new relationship, and think you may be at risk and/or suspect your partner may have a history of domestic abuse, you can request information under Clare's Law here.
The charities below can offer free 24/7 help via telephone or online chat. The National Centre for Domestic Violence assisted me with a Non-Molestation order to keep myself and my children safe, the cost was taken care of by the charity too.
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The following support is also available in Essex:
Compass: A partnership of domestic abuse services providing a response in Essex.
Changing Pathways: Provides free and confidential support and advocacy to individuals of any gender subjected to domestic abuse and stalking in the areas of Basildon, Brentwood, Castle Point, Epping Forest, Harlow, Rochford and Thurrock.
The Change Project: Charity based in Chelmsford, Essex who have been delivering Respect accredited domestic abuse perpetrator programmes since 2009. Through the behavioural change of the abuser they aim to increase the well-being of people who are, or have been, living with conflict or domestic abuse.
My inbox is always open if you want to chat, please know that you are not alone, with the professional support of the above services, friends and family, please know that there is a life after abuse.